27 February, 2010

what ever happened to ricky martin?

seriously, where the hell did that guy go? i'm worried. no one has seen him since the 90s. i could just google him and find out but speculating with various friends is way more fun. i've heard, smack head in portugal, raising twin boys in south america and at a long shot some think he could be that ugly betty girl.

this got me thinking, what happens to one hit wonders and character actors when their week long career comes to its inevitable end? a retirement home in the desert seems likely. i can just see bea arthur, the guys from eiffel 65 and the cast of 90210 all sitting around playing monopoly whilst arguing about who's career is still alive. that's an argument none of them should win.

well it really isn't a problem, none of them are coming back. maybe they are really living on an island with old school skin heads and hunchbacks.....you just don't see them anymore.

23 February, 2010

shinny pretty things

ok so i can blame my generation all i want; how peer pressure and the media have forced me into shopping like a crazy person during an economic crisis but that would be a dirty lie. i just like shinny things that are pretty and make me feel pretty, is that so wrong? the answer is 'yes' but i strive to live well below my parents and friends expectations of me whilst wearing $300 shoes and a michael kors coat when my job could fall out from underneath me.

don't even get me started on how much money i owe various people. oh that reminds me, if i owe you money get in quick cause the cash i got is going fast. winter clothes are so much cooler than the summer ones i also think they are more expensive cause of all the extra material. there are some nudie jeans that have been calling my name as well, probably doesn't help that i walk past them a few dozen times a day.

well it's time for this trashy, narcissistic and fairly pointless post to end. apologies, to everyone who bothered to read this far. ill do better next time. maybe.

19 February, 2010

arguably my favouritest royal.

princess margaret, was a total fox. i was talking to kathryn about this the other day and felt that my love for the drunken, tardie, criminal kicking, smoking younger sister to the current queen of england is perfectly warranted. yes, she had a stroke and died from the way she chose to live her life but come on, a few hot husbands and a life dressed in expensive clothes with tones of money....things could have been worse.

ALSO, respect to surviving a kidnap attempt by telling her would be assassin to 'shove it!' when asked to co-operate or die.

so those olympics....

well i probably should talk about the olympics. as a hardened skier who hates snowboarders for their lack of ski field manners, i am very disgusted by the fact that i am totally in love with the sport! i mean seriously, they might not go as fast as the downhill skiers but man what they lack in speed they make up with in cool. 'rockstars', is what the commentators are calling them but i think its just the baggy pants that evoke connotations with surfers and skater.

its official, on my upcoming trip to new zealand i'm going to give snowboarding the proper college try. after watching torah win her gold medal...it doesn't look that hard.

15 February, 2010

the cool kids of classical music

yes another dirtyrottencheatingblogpost but ole josh sent this to cait the other day and i 'vid blocked' them. though, the song is a love of last year because the start of chorus is amazing, the cd is also great as a whole and finally (and most importantly) it reminds me of [H]ouse!

this version with the bbc concert orchestra, shows once again that the bbc crew are not at all snooty like their fellow classical musicians. if you dig this and cello music now turns you on, do take a gander at 'bill bailey's remarkable guide to the orchestra'. tis good shit.

13 February, 2010

hello mister toaster, bath time?

so tomorrow is valentines day and because i'm working i will be posting my holiday blog today! wasn't meant to be working but i think because i mocked jp in a room full of people, the universe decided to punish me.

given that saint valentine was a 3rd century roman priest who was stoned and beheaded, wouldn't a more appropriate celebration of the evening be taking one's steady guy or gal to witness a brutal murder?

happy valentines day couples AND fellow single people try not to kill yourselves. i've heard wine helps with that.

12 February, 2010

decisions decisions equals problems problems

so i have sorta tricked myself into facing problems with me, my life and what i want to be different. so this all led to changing my uni degree. arts central told me it was as easy as one form, turns out they are idiots and have proceeded to completely frak up my academic life!! gah! these are smart people, how can they possibly be THAT incompetent?

so now i've started the fixing process. will no one answer my emails? seriously, i cant handle this. being so unsure of what im meant to be doing in 3 bloody weeks! oh and ALSO guess what, the first yr psych co-ordinator isn't back from holidays. uni goes back in 2 weeks and he is still skiing in switzerland! well i have had enough! crying and violent phone calls are my next tactical manoeuvre and if that doesn't work i will drink heavily and shout at you!

but on the only bright side, i do really love my new job! though, it is going to hurt my bank balance with pretty clothes just upstairs. i already have my eye on a $260 pair of nudie jeans. i need them for work, they are essential, honestly!

10 February, 2010

google buzz, twitters ugly half sister.

the last 2 days have been a series of consecutive hurdles for miss mchelle. i have felt the need to vent and as im catholic and dont know how to express my feelings in a well adjusted healthy way ill blog instead. nothing very earth shattering but the whole facebook change over of format was just mean. it happened to caitlin a few days before it happened to me so i thought i had been missed by the evil fb fairy and was of course jubilant. so when the change came it hit me where i live. nothing in this world stays the same.

thank god i have twitter. not that anyone follows me (thou gomez did today, that was exciting) but if they change their format they run the risk of pissing off stephen fry and no company needs that. the 'letter to the editors' alone could bring down a billion dollar business. i mean, if apple consultants are called 'genius' then anything in this world is possible. seriously, how is knowing how to press three buttons to force an unexpected reboot of an iPod the work of a genius?

but i digress, this all has led me to todays disturbing discovery. google buzz! what the frak! why do we need another social networking site? 1, im clearly narcissistic enough and 2, does google want me to fail uni? because when i do they can inherit my hex debt! google buzz is just an ugly version of twitter! a badly thought out rip off that is never going to work. its like dating dani minogue when you could just as easily sleep with kylie! makes no sense and i will have no part in it.

though if you do accidentally read this and it floats your boat do follow me on twitter im always desperate for friends/minions!

08 February, 2010

european football is believed by most texans to be a commie plot!

so when i was watching the super bowl today (for the first time ever) two things struck me. the game itself has very little to do with the players using their feet and what was with the half-time show?

so the game, this was may first experience of gridiron btw, was interesting because it was different and new. BUT come on these players, that the commentators insisted on comparing to gladiators, were complete wusses. yes the game is high impact but if they didn't insist on wearing armour and intricate protective head gear there would probably be less inguries. ALSO, they don't even play a whole game. different players for offensive and defensive, one group is hard at it getting a 'touch down', that does not actually require the ball to touch the ground, whilst the defensive group are doing what? getting a massage? having a nap? pft lame!

secondly, the half-time entertainment. now i love the who, rodger daltry is a god. but im not sure the stadium of spectators in miami knew they were from england. now thats ok, i presume they were drunk but could the organisers not get another band who was at least age appropriate and the personification of AMERICAN football. maybe im nitpicking, it all just seemed a bit mismatched to me.

oh well, another thing to add to my list of bazar american pastimes that i don't think i will ever understand. it can go right under midget wrestling and their method for electing government officials. though, this does get me excited. i can't wait for their 'worldseries' of baseball. america always wins....huh, weird.

07 February, 2010

great zombie bands. its sad when you find they're really dead.

THE UNICORNS are my latest musical find. thanks to super trendy canadian friends, how i met your mother and the shuffle settings on my ipod i have a shinny new love. if indie music is your thing and you are not adverse to a bit of amp feedback then give these guys a listen.

but, the sad thing is they are no longer together and the album, 'who will cut our hair when we're gone?' was their only studio release. if you can get your hands on its amazingness i applaud you. check out their tunes on myspacemusic, i really love the song 'tuff ghost'. you can download yourself a copy but if your a music puritan and dont like to, well steal music, then click here for full info at amazon.com. they are amazing. you're welcome.

05 February, 2010

damn those bath monkeys

reading in the bath has proven to not be the best idea in the world so now i've been forced to just thinking there, to pass the time. i do my best work there actually. anyway whilst washing my hair i was hit with a conundrum. we are all familiar with the japanese proverb, 'sanbiki no saru' that translated literally means 'three monkeys'.

the three wise monkeys, embody the proverb, 'see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil' and shows each of the three monkeys covering their eyes, ears and mouth. in some cases there is also included a fourth monkey covering its stomach, meaning 'do no evil'.

so this got me thinking, whilst soaking in bubbles, if evil is all about the senses what about the other two? touch has massive biblical connotations. being touched by the devil, in monotheistic religions, is the way satan (judeo-christian) or iblis (islam) enter the body of innocent people. during the salem witch trials in new england, freckles and moles where physical indicators of people who had been touched by the devil. so where is the 'touch' monkey? maybe it's a historical thing, the east and west had not met when the maxim was first developed in the 8th century. but that's for history nerds far smarter than me.

but if im perfectly honest, this whole dilemma did spring from the idea. if the devil exists, he is a bad dude and surely personal hygiene isnt at the top of his 'to-do' list plus sulphur is smelly and hell is littered with it (apparently). therefore....'smell no evil' monkey is just smart philosophysing. right?!

04 February, 2010


now boys and girls, this is why you should sleep every night and choose your friends wisely.

funniest episode yet, poor leonard....

03 February, 2010

espresso is for sissies

well not really, but siphon brewed coffee is AMAZING. according to coffeegeek.com it is set to make a well deserved come back. developed in france and germany some 160 years ago, this way of brewing coffee is remarkably simple yet the flavour that it is able to extract from the bean (especially single origin coffees) is phenomenal. today, at my hopefully new place of employment, i was showed how the method of brewing works. the consistency and flavour is comparable to a long black but, that just does not do it justice. if you dont like strong coffee or vibrant flavours then this might not be for you, give it a try anyway.

looking at the whole percolating set-up it does make you feel like you might need an advanced degree in chemistry to operate it, but it is actually really easy....even i can do it. if you can even get your hands on one for your own home i can not recommend them enough.

all i can say is ask ya friendly neighbourhood barista, for a cup of this magical liquid.

01 February, 2010

ringtones? they're so neanderthal.

ok ok ok so im handing this post over to david mitchell. the man is a legend. so get ready for some actual proper, honest to god real professional writing comedian funniness. he went went to cambridge university you know.

although if you like your phone, little umbrellas in your cocktail, smoking, acupuncture OR early man id give it a miss.

so here we go!